Oh, and I found my old journal!

was repeatedly abused by a ten-year-old boy.

It's 911 in the morning and 1-900 in the evening.

I guess it's just you and me. Got your saw and sandpaper?

and thus becomes "negative reinforcement,"

Brittany and Chuck. You fail.

And like a husband going home to his noble and self-sacrificing wife,

shattering the grown child's fragile psyche and triggering a psychotic and possibly deadly episode.

The food there is, like, really good and the waiters are, like, really foreign.

Kevin... I want you to put the door down and step away from the maze, and no one will get hurt.

Oh, and I'll tell Quinn to fire up the grill.

And I really like this yellow dip.

his scraggly goatee and cheap, dangly earring

I've got the house, the paycheck, and they're all lying dead in a stinking rice paddy.

Maybe if you and Kevin work well together,

But Kevin and I broke up that week.

filed your disgusting magazines and finished your shopping.

But I did it for us, and Whitney.

You feed them, you wait on them, and then,

My teen years... a nightmare of shame and guilt.