- 80,000 of them. - Really?

- Hoss... Where might I find the Bandit? - I ain't seen him.

By the way, where did you get all them warthogs back there?

- Cledus, where the hell are we? - Four miles to go, good buddy.

I find it hard to look at you, Waynette, especially with those things in your hair.

Don't take your foot off of that hammer. Them bears'll pour over you like maple syrup.

I have enough to get to Jersey, walk the rest of the way.

Can I have a couple of cheeseburgers to go and a glass of iced tea?

Because I've got to go in the morning to Conyers and pick up a load of manure.

(MAN ON CB) Sounds good to me, Tower of Power. Listen, buddy...

20 to one I break the son of a bitch this time.

- Sorry. I don't want to get married. - Terrific That makes two of us.

I'd no idea this dress would be so hard to get out of.

I'll thank you not to use that kind of language in my presence.

You to get out of this dumb-ass rodeo and accept a real challenge.

Don't lose your head, son. We still got a lot of boogiein' to do.

- I was standing in the parking lot... - I'm sitting next to Lawrence of Arabia.

We also lost a lot of valuable time. We gonna really have to cook.

No. We're just gonna run over to Texarkana and pick up 400 cases of Coors

I'm still tryin' to get rid of that Texas County mountie. I don't know what the hell he wants.