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The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

4.2s

The exact moment when you emerged from your mother's vaginal canal.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.9s

Dwight, may I have your chair, please?

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

3.8s

my mother hired a pony and a cart

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

3.3s

and I am your boss, I think you should just go home.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.4s

How dare you, sir. You are gross.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

4.3s

And my mother was rubbing cream on me for probably three hours

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.8s

Oh, these all your kids?

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

4.1s

Apparently, my mother is the only one who cares enough to send me anything.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.4s

I guess I forgot.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.3s

I'm returning your call. You said it was urgent.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.6s

I'm just helping you invest in your future, my friend.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

4.2s

Totally private. You can say whatever is in your heart.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

3.7s

All right, so raise your hand if you wanna get rich.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.6s

You get no time to spend with your wife and kids.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.9s

Well, I guess I forgot to give you a donut.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.6s

I said, Happy birthday.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.7s

When I was seven,

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

1.8s

When I was 16,

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

2.6s

So, that was the worst birthday I think I ever had.

The Office (2005) - S02E19 Michael's Birthday

4.2s

So, I have a perfect icebreaker if I ever meet Teri Hatcher.