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Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.8s

- Yeah, I was a prep-school honors student

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.5s

I killed a pug. She was so cute though.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.5s

Before I was the girl with a runaway mom,

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

1.5s

when I was strangling her.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

1.7s

I guess I didn't notice I was speeding cause

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

3.2s

- [ Sighs ] I was hoping I wouldn't need to resort to this,

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2s

to Kyle's beach house anymore. Huh?

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.9s

Baba trimmed my bangs when I was and Child Protective Services

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

3s

I thought she was going to stab me in self-defense,

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

5.7s

One harsh winter when I little girl, it was big day.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.1s

- Hmmm. I don't taste a thing.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2s

But I might need a push.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

4.4s

Whenever I really need a good cry, I come here.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

3.1s

I happen to be a professional grief processor.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.3s

to read a bitch, I hereby sentence you both

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.5s

- I told you I'm a lost cause. [ Ducks quacking ]

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.7s

- Why don't I get a bottle filled with milk?!

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

2.3s

then I can get back to a more sustainable level

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

3s

You missed a spot. - Girl, I can relate to that.

Teenage Euthanasia (2021) - S01E03 First Date with the Second Coming

3s

I waxed my pubes in the shape of a solo cup.