Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Well, well, well, someone's read The Tempest.

Boba bubble-butt bitch!

to the Forever 21 here, there, now."

Yes! She'll be so devastated she'll fall right in love with me.

And my whole family knows about the shirt.

-What's that supposed to mean? -It means I'm breaking up with you.

That you hold a PhD in Jess-onomics from Glazer State.

What? Andrew! I am your teacher.

Ugh! The woman is a gambling addict.

[doorbell rings]

-Hey, how are you doing? -Pretty shitty. Thanks for asking.

How do you know she works at the library?

Is it Sarah? Is that the problem?

-We all fucked up. -[sighs] We did.

-You really had to be there, ma'am. -[laughs]

I'm your girlfriend, Ali, and she's just some jerk you fart with.

This dry cunt calls that an apology?

I'm not taking anybody's side.

-Cool. -It's signed by Pete Rose's dead brother.

"Roast me in sulfur!

[in accent] You've gotta try this here pineapple here, there, Samira.

I was finishing my homework.

That makes my heart melt.

but the important thing is that I'm here for you,

Bill fucking Shakespeare!

That's such a bummer.

I bet she rolls her dingleberries in her fingers.

Nick! Wait! Before you go,

Did you know I am a board-certified cunnilingus doula?

-[fizzling, popping] -[grunts]

♪ I'm going through changes ♪

I'm sorry. Something came over me.

Okay, hold on. I'm into guys.

-Smells like pussy. -Okay, good.

It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock the meat it feeds on!"

you need to dump Gina,